We are wired for attachment in a world of impermanence. Each attachment that is broken, each change, whether as seemingly insignificant as the pipes of a organ or as profound as the death of a parent is a loss that our 'wiring' can scarcely contain.

- Robert Neimeyer, January 9, 2024

Grief Support and End of Life Guidance

When loss or the prospect of loss come to us, our lives as we have known them are shattered. This could be the death of a loved one or being diagnosed with an illness that our physician tells us is likely terminal. In either situation we may find ourselves in desolate territory which should not have to be traveled alone.

My personal and professional life have called me to walk with those who are trying to find their way in the landscape of grief where there are no trail markers. My intention in this work is to offer companionable support to those whose lives are shaken by loss, grief and the fear of dying.

About Frank Stafford Davis, PhD., LICSW

I have worked in the fields of education, parish ministry, and outpatient psychotherapy. I have also volunteered my time co-facilitating grief support groups. In addition to these vocational pursuits, I have had opportunities to participate in a variety of related activities which include coaching high school soccer, leading youth canoe trips and helping to create a variety of community outreach projects on the Mesabi Iron Range.

Education

M.A. and Ph.D. in Psychology
Duquesne University
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

M. Div.
Yale Divinity School
New Haven, Connecticut

B.A. in Religion
Williams College
Williamstown, Massachusetts

Continuing education in Narrative Therapy and Psychosynthesis

Professional Memberships, Associations and Licensure

Clinical Member of the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy
Member of the Association for the Advancement of Psychosynthesis
Member of the Board of Directors of the Range Mental Health Center (1993-2011)
Licensed by the State of Minnesota Board of Social Work as a Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker ( LICSW )
Ordained minister in the Presbyterian Church (U.S.A.)

What is grief support?

Grief and loss come in many forms and can be helpfully addressed in a variety of ways. The focus of my work is specifically to assist individuals, couples and families bereaved by the loss of loved ones. The primary means of this support comes through careful, respectful and empathic listening as those bereaved share the stories of their loss and subsequent grief. In offering support, it is not my place to provide ready made answers and solutions to the pain that loss brings. My role is to mindfully walk with those who are treading the diﬃcult path of having lost a loved one. My work is to support the bereaved in finding the words, insights and choices that nurture meaning and purpose in the midst of grief and loss. During times of grief some people may choose to draw upon spiritual resources. I am very comfortable working with those for whom spirituality and religious beliefs serve as sources of strength and growth.

Grief support might also include mindfulness practices, prayer, guided imagery, listening to music, journaling or contemplative time in nature. Other forms of support could include recommendations for educational resources, referrals to other professionals (clergy, physicians, psychologists, clinical social workers or others) when appropriate, and possibly participation in grief support groups. Grief support normalizes grief as a natural response to the loss of a loved one. The grief support I offer does not make mental health diagnoses. The grief support I offer is not psychotherapy. Rather, my approach to grief support aims to co-create with participants a space in which they are able to find encouragement in moving through loss by cultivating gifts of acceptance, honesty, authenticity, openness and resilience.
What is end of life guidance?

Individuals diagnosed with life threatening diseases often experience significant personal distress, as they may face daunting medical interventions without certainty that these treatments will lead to a cure for their particular condition. For many patients, there may come a time when disease reaches a threshold point where the medical focus shifts from treating the disease to a focus on making the patient as comfortable as possible. In either of these cases, individuals may feel called to begin coming to terms with the inevitability of their death. Turning oneʼs thoughts in this direction may elicit a host of deep feelings including disappointment, anger, sadness, hopelessness, shame and grief among others. End of life guidance may assist individuals in reflecting on their current circumstances as a means of coming to terms with the end of life in ways that nurture peace in the face of the unknown.

My role in offering end of life guidance is to listen carefully, empathically and respectfully as individuals share their journey through this stage of their lives. It is not my place to offer ready made answers to questions about how to find meaning in the face of death. Rather my role is to mindfully walk with those who are facing the nearness of death so that they can find their own authentic path of coming to terms with the end of life.

Depending on an individualʼs medical condition, personal understanding of death, religious/spiritual orientation and specific wishes regarding support, end of life guidance can include life review, mindfulness practices, prayer, guided imagery, listening to music, forgiveness rituals with family members and/or friends, and other practices to encourage acceptance and the value of their life. End of life guidance might also involve referrals and/or collaboration with other professionals (clergy, physicians, psychologists, clinical social workers, hospice workers, or others). End of life guidance can include family members and friends of the one who is facing death. Depending on the wishes of the individual and family members, end of life guidance might involve home visits (possibly to nursing homes and assisted living facilities) but not hospital visits where care would be exclusive to the medical team and hospice workers.

The approach I take in end of life guidance work does not make mental health diagnoses. The end of life guidance I offer is not psychotherapy. My intention in end of life guidance is to co-create with those seeking my help a safe, loving and caring space so that death is less fearful for the dying and their families. I view individuals who seek end of life guidance not as patients, but as participants.

If you are interested in scheduling an appointment or have questions, please contact me at (218) 428-4432.